How did I hurt this friend you ask? Well, I opted not to join her for her birthday. She throws a party every year. First was pirate themed followed by carnival and was the last one under the sea?
Anyhow they were always fun.
This year I decided I did not want to go, seeing as I can't afford to. I plan on buying a truck and bus fair would subtract from my fund. I also wanted to stick around for the car wash at my church that I have missed every year for her. I guess It's selfish wanting to go bowling with my co-workers. She actually said, "I can't believe you chose people you may only know for five years over me who you will know for the rest of your life."
Apparently she couldn't tell me these thoughts before her birthday when I told her I couldn't come. If she truly knew me she would know I prefer honesty, we could have discussed it. Had I known this was her big final bash and that she only planned it and spent so much money on it for me, I would have went. I only went the previous years to enjoy her company. The parties were okay but I enjoyed going swimming with her and camping, the stuff before and after the party. We had great conversations, and the quiet times, I enjoyed getting to see her everyday for a week. That's why I went. Sadly I missed the best out of all her parties.
I'm such a mean friend. I haven't even bought her a gift yet. She's hard to buy for.
So I don't know what to say to her, I love her to death. I don't like hurting her feelings. Why have I become so selfish? This will bug me until I figure out what to say to her. Hopefully she can forgive me.
If you have any thoughts please comment. Perhaps you can give me the words to say.
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